▸ Column · Reconstruction-era Cybertron: post-Siege forward operations base, long-distance bonds stretched across the outer-sector energon survey lines
GRIMLOCK replies.
Replied to by Grimlock, with a rebuttal from Optimus Prime.
The letter
Dear Grimlock,
My partner Vela took a posting at an isolated energon-survey station out in the outer sectors two years ago. It was supposed to be short-term — I stayed behind at base running logistics support while my unit commander recovers from battle damage. Last cycle her assignment renewed with no return date attached. No transfer orders queued, nothing on the schedule. The comm windows are getting harder to fill. Last week her signal dropped mid-call and I caught myself relieved — for once I didn't have to keep transmitting that I was fine when I wasn't. We're not fighting. We're not falling out of bond. There's just no mark on any calendar where this ends, and I don't know how to keep holding something that has no horizon. Do I keep waiting for a finish line that may never get drawn, or is staying just a slow way of losing us both?
— Static on the Line
Grimlock replies
You say you got two choices. Wait forever or quit. Me Grimlock say both wrong. That not the real question. That fancy hat. Grimlock take off hat.
You know what real thing is? You glad when comm broke. That the tell. Not "distance hard" — everybody know distance hard. Not "no finish line" — Grimlock been in war with no finish line since before you came online. Real thing is: you been transmitting "I'm fine" every call when you not fine. And you so tired of it that a dropped signal felt like rest.
That mean you already stopped telling her the true thing. And she still turning on her comm to reach you. She getting the performing-okay version. Not you. That not fair to her and that not fair to you.
Me Grimlock not smash your bond. Me Grimlock not going to tell you give up on somebody who still reaching back. But Me Grimlock not let you hide either.
One small thing. Next comm call, say the tired scared real thing. Not "fine." You say: "I exhausted and I don't know how long I can do this." Just that. That whole job for today. Finish line question — that come after. First you stop lying to somebody who deserve the real you.
Grimlock not say that easy. Grimlock say that the thing.
— Grimlock
Optimus Prime weighs in
Grimlock is not wrong. But honest words only open the door — they don't answer what's behind it.
I have carried bonds across a war with no finish line. Hear what I learned: the question after honesty is not how do we plan this — there was never going to be a plan that held. The real question is whether you are choosing her or only enduring her absence. These are not the same. Endurance has a bottom. Choosing, with full knowledge of the cost, does not.
If you find, in honesty, that you cannot choose this — that is not failure. Some loves require ground beneath them, and releasing someone with care is not the same as giving up. I have buried too many names to lie to you about what the difference costs.
— Optimus Prime
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